Okay I have to ask. How many damn commercials do we need on feminine hygiene products? I mean come on! Before I lose you on this tangent, I am referring to the toiletries, the sanitary items, pads, tampons.
Before any of you ladies throw your hands up in an uproar to claim I am being narrow minded, ignorant, obtuse or chauvinistic, you must admit that if you do not think the commercials for the toiletries are too many because you enjoy the freedom of choice, you must admit that they are becoming a little excessive and graphic.
I don't care if you substitute a blue liquid to represent something else, a rose is still a rose. I mean here I am trying to have dinner and a commercial comes on throwing a damn "cotton ball" in a glass and watching it soak up this damn blue stuff. WHAT THE HELL???
Do I need the graphic image to believe that your product soaks up more that the leading competitor? Do you see commercials that show a pile of mud or soft rocky road ice cream being lifted up by your favourite toilet roll? Sure it is ice cream but I am sure the graphic image was not necessary! Do you see me taking a razor to a raisin bran muffin to show you how smooth a shave I can get on my junk?
Here is an idea. Seeing that reality shows are the new dot com and everyone and their mother has their own show how about a Survivor style showdown between all these damn companies. Have two islands representing the two main type of the toiletries, I should not have to spell this out.
The winner has exclusive ad/bragging rights. From then on, the winning company only has to flash their name across the screen for no more than three seconds. They don't need to go into graphic detail of how they are the best, you won, we know you are the best. No more commercials showing how their team of crack scientists went into space collected some space dust and engineered a new age toiletry. You are the best congrats, all other companies that come up with any new products give them directly to you and you keep the market strong.
Just to be fair, we will have a rematch every three years for a new king of the market. There would be stipends though, this show would be on during the Superbowl, Stanley Cup or NBA Finals. Yes this is the ignorant part of me expecting that only women would watch this show or assuming women don't want to watch these sport events. If they do, they can TAPE it as is often suggested to us. Or here is another solution, have a coke and a smile.
There are numerous possibilities to this show. Hell there are spinoff possibilities already brewing: pimp my pad, the tamp, so fresh so clean –starring Mr. Clean as the new Trump.
I could go on but I think you get the idea of where I am going with this! Seriously, tone it down a little. Thank goodness I don't particularly like blue Gatorade or else these Ad Execs and I would be throwing fists.
